Monday, November 26, 2012

What'd I be in Game Of Thrones

I'd like to be approached in the street by a fancy-man touting for men and boys, who then goes on to explain  that rather than being some kind of a sexual predator he's actually a casting agent for interesting bit-parts in the Game of Thrones TV series.

I've been trying to figure out what bit-part I'd most like to be, and more importantly, trying to figure out if I'd mind getting my cock out as it seems most of the actors on the series are wont to do. (spoiler - I would)

There's a few options of general parts you could be, so let's look into them and decide which is best for me to choose when this strange man approaches me (or indeed any of us) offering the part.

  1. One of the southerners
  2. One of the northerners
  3. Some kind of a peasant in mud
  4. One of the swarthy ones from across the sea
  5. A zombie-thing
I think the swarthy ones are cool. I can't remember his name and I don't want to have to look it up (even though someone remembering this character's name is a major plot point, yet to be played out) but there's one guy who is some kind of faceless assassin. I like him. I also liked the dancing-teacher, who wasn't really a dancing teacher, but a sword master - although with dancing like mine I could potentially cause more injuries than he could with a sword.

I don't really like many of the southerner ones, apart from the half-man. He's good. I couldn't play his part though, because: He already does; There's a certain physicality attached to the role; I'm not an actor. I also think that playing one of these southerner parts I'd mess up my accent more often than not and would have to be escorted off-set.

That leaves me as either a zombie, a northerner or a muddy peasant.

The northerners are ok. I could certainly talk like one of them without too much fuss, and these are the guys who more often than not have their cocks out. There is, however the thing about the skill in acting and also, a skill in being able to fight things - or at least act like it. I'm not cut out for this - and my haircut is probably wrong.

So, I'm left with a muddy peasant or a shambler. The shamblers seem ok and there's not much speaking involved - I assume. They do all look quite ripped, for zombies at least, and I doubt that the casting predator would be prepared to wait for me to get ripped. He's probably casted a load of ripped young lads already. Thoroughly.

Muddy peasant then? I'll just stop at home eh? Acting is so hard to break into. 

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